First mother’s day

Whether you’ve lost your little one too soon, have your little one with or are still waiting for your little one, I wish you a Happy Mother’s day!

Today is also Mother’s day here in Finland. (Father’s day is on a different day, though.) It’s an actual holiday here and the stores are closed. I’ve never paid too much attention to Mother’s day, whether I was in the US or in Finland. My mom never wanted any of us kids to go out and buy her stuff, she’d rather we make her something, do something nice for her and/or just be nice (every day of the year, not just this one day). But this year’s mother’s day is completely different than any other year.

This year is the first year my mom is no longer with me. She died in June of last year. And if I remember correctly, Mother’s day was the last time I heard her voice. I called her that day and we chatted a bit and that’s the last time I actually talked to her. I did type-chat with her one last time for a short period after that on Facebook where she told me my/our cat, Sabby, had died and I taught her how to make smileys.

This year is also the first year I’m a mother myself. After trying so hard and for so long (almost 3,5 years), I’ve finally got a little one growing in me. I’m nearing 7 months along and in another week and a half I’ll be in the 3rd trimester. This still feels nothing short of a miracle and for this I am grateful.

This year is such a mixture of emotions. I can’t help but be sad that my mom isn’t here to celebrate this long awaited event. But at the same time, I’m looking forward to the day when Paxlet is born and here with us.
Wherever my mom is, I’m thinking of her and missing her.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “First mother’s day

  1. Hi, My name is Knoll Maria and I am a graduate student at Bar-Ilan University Information Science Department in Israel. For my final project, I am examining anonymity and self-disclosure in infertility blogs. The target population of the study are women bloggers who were or are going through infertility treatments and also blog about their experience. I am kindly inviting you to participate in this research study by completing the attached survey.The following questionnaire will require approximately 5 minutes to complete. Your response is very important to me. Your informed consent to participate in this survey is assumed by completing the survey and by submitting it. Participation is strictly voluntary and you may refuse to participate at any time. A copy of the results will be sent to you, if you choose so.Thank you for taking the time to assist me in my educational endeavors. If you require additional information or have questions, please contact by email. Click here to fill out the survey: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/viewform?formkey=dHY0SC1wT0lHeEFqOGdZN3pXT3p3aHc6MQ

  2. Like Katriina said…a bittersweet day. But I like to think that your mom is watching over you and Paxlet and that she was with both of you yesterday.*hugs*

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s